Do woodlice get cancer?

This morning I have had a pre-chemo Spring clean of my abode. I am not a slut around the house, not at all. But every so often, I like to have a proper clean up...more than the general tidy-up I have on a daily basis...I move furniture, wash the utility room floor, sort out the pile of paerwork that wants attention...that sort of thing.

Having a clean and tidy living area makes my mind settle. I feel whole, clean, healthy and sorted. If only life really was that simple...I could spring clean my health back to before-Colin normal with the hoover and a J-cloth.

Anyway, I was hoovering under one of my kilim rugs (I told you, a proper clean) and I saw a woodlouse. Not sure where he came from and how long he had been there...but he was a dead woodlouse.

And it got me to thinking, do woodlice get cancer? Do they have teeny tiny Colins forming under their armour plating? And what about squirrels? And birds? Duckbilledplatypusses (is that the plural?).

I did ethics at university as part of a set of wild courses in Philosophy...in the quest to widen the academic horizons of the undergraduate minds, my university postively encouraged students to take a course out of their area. I did Literature. So I chose a few wild courses in philosophy...and did a year of Ethics. I learnt about the animal world, particularly chimps and apes...all about Rousseau's noble savage V Hobbes' Leviathan and all that shit...

...the animal world is actually very ordered. It's heirarchical structures, familial groups and politics makes the human world look rather weak really...those chimps and birds know how to make things work. Simply and effectively.

Do they know when one of their own gets cancer? Do they nurse them to their deaths or do they mercy kill them? Elephants take themselves off when they know the time is right...bit like me really, if it ever comes to that.

Oh the spring cleaning world of plaingoldband today takes me back to seminars with bearded, kipper-tye wearing Professor Norman and Dr Cherry...

I have a day at home today, thus the cleaning. I feel like I haven't had a moment to myself since Colin got diagnosed. I enjoy an hour in bed with a coffee and a novel, followed by another coffee and a croissant and a clean up. This afternoon I have a backlog of Sky+ recorded crime series to catch up on...craftily did some food shopping yesterday so I don't have to step out of the house today, let alone my post code area.

My world, for today, is ordered, clean and I feel whole. I have had a grope, just to make sure Colin is still there (he is, as are the bruises from all the biopsies I endured 2 weeks ago). Colin and Malcom can go to hell today. Today is my day...no cancer, no doctors, no 'a positive attitude will hold you in good stead' lines. Today is all mine...

...although I might ring Drummond and see how the BRMC guest list quest is going.